Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
It's Teacher Appreciation Week!
I can't believe another school year has zipped by! It's been a difficult year for teachers here in the Golden State and through out the United States. Like many teachers, my colleagues and I soothed ourselves by feeding each other. I think the ten pounds I gained over the course of the last six months is proof of that. However Teacher Appreciation Week is the gold standard of indulgence for teachers!
All over the State, Parent-Teacher Associations and Parent Teacher Organizations feed the teachers with delicious and, let's face it, fattening food. Bagels, donuts, sandwiches, chips, cookies, muffins. It's a beautiful and highly appreciated gift our parents give to those of us who care for their children. However, those of us who are watching our waistlines need to be careful navigating events like theses.
In my weight loss support group, I notice that my profession is not the only one that seems to invite temptation in the staff room. 400 calorie bagels (without cream cheese!) seem to be standard in most corporate lunch rooms. It's a strange day when the donuts are the least caloric thing on offer nowadays (average donut 200 calories, average bagel 350).
Here's what I do (when I am watching my calories--sometimes I just go for it to be honest):
1. DO NOT EAT THE BAGELS. Most bagels on offer lately are ENORMOUS, made with highly processed flour (which basically converts to sugar in your bloodstream) and beg to be smeared with cream cheese or butter.
2. Do eat anything with protein. Sometimes, people bring in cheese or yogurt to these breakfast/lunch things. Protein is filling and will help your body manage any sugar spikes.
3. Fruit is always a good option. Lately, more fruit has been on offer at our staff snack sessions; if this is the case with your work, go for it!
4. Homemade goods are a good option. For example, a homemade chocolate chip cookie hovers around 50-75 calories. A fancy store bought cookie can run around 100 calories. Also, the portions are usually smaller.
5. Sandwiches: You've been to meetings and conferences and been tortured by the ubiquitous sandwich platter. I usually just nix the bread and eat the inside or tear off the top of the roll and eat it as a half sandwich. Sorry, I don't eat chips--even baked ones.
6. Birthday cake: I love cake--seriously love cake. So, I just eat the cake and leave the frosting on my plate. The average birthday cake with frosting is 100 calories an ounce. Without the frosting, it's half that. Also, there is a lot less sugar in just the cake, so it makes me less hungry (when my blood sugar spikes, I get ravenous!).
7. Conference Food: If you are forced to eat banquet food, here are the pitfalls: the dessert is sometimes placed on the table before you sit down. These desserts are rarely worth the calories. Ask the nearest server to take it away or just walk it to the back of the banquet hall and put it in the garbage. Banquet food is loaded with cheap starches like rice and noodles. Avoid these like the plague, they are soaked in fat! It's better for you to just eat the meat and veg. I always ask what the vegetarian option is, sometimes it's a better option than the regular menu--however usually it is some sort of starch drowning in sauce, like fettuccine Alfredo. Also, ask for more salad, most servers will hook you up with another one if you ask nicely. Finally, scrape off the sauce and dip your meat into it. It tastes just as good, and you probably save yourself 100 calories by not eating all of the sauce.
Here is what I have learned since December: I can never go back to eating the way I used to eat, but I don't have to be on a diet all the time. These strategies are good for anyone who wants to eat healthfully most of the time. I am moving into a mentality that it is okay for me to splurge once in a while, but to not view every special occasion as an opportunity to splurge.
The numbers:
Starting weight 235
Current weight 155
Goal weight: mmm....working on that!
Inner goal: peace.
Outer goal: Run the Nike 1/2 Marathon!
See you soon!
All over the State, Parent-Teacher Associations and Parent Teacher Organizations feed the teachers with delicious and, let's face it, fattening food. Bagels, donuts, sandwiches, chips, cookies, muffins. It's a beautiful and highly appreciated gift our parents give to those of us who care for their children. However, those of us who are watching our waistlines need to be careful navigating events like theses.
In my weight loss support group, I notice that my profession is not the only one that seems to invite temptation in the staff room. 400 calorie bagels (without cream cheese!) seem to be standard in most corporate lunch rooms. It's a strange day when the donuts are the least caloric thing on offer nowadays (average donut 200 calories, average bagel 350).
Here's what I do (when I am watching my calories--sometimes I just go for it to be honest):
1. DO NOT EAT THE BAGELS. Most bagels on offer lately are ENORMOUS, made with highly processed flour (which basically converts to sugar in your bloodstream) and beg to be smeared with cream cheese or butter.
2. Do eat anything with protein. Sometimes, people bring in cheese or yogurt to these breakfast/lunch things. Protein is filling and will help your body manage any sugar spikes.
3. Fruit is always a good option. Lately, more fruit has been on offer at our staff snack sessions; if this is the case with your work, go for it!
4. Homemade goods are a good option. For example, a homemade chocolate chip cookie hovers around 50-75 calories. A fancy store bought cookie can run around 100 calories. Also, the portions are usually smaller.
5. Sandwiches: You've been to meetings and conferences and been tortured by the ubiquitous sandwich platter. I usually just nix the bread and eat the inside or tear off the top of the roll and eat it as a half sandwich. Sorry, I don't eat chips--even baked ones.
6. Birthday cake: I love cake--seriously love cake. So, I just eat the cake and leave the frosting on my plate. The average birthday cake with frosting is 100 calories an ounce. Without the frosting, it's half that. Also, there is a lot less sugar in just the cake, so it makes me less hungry (when my blood sugar spikes, I get ravenous!).
7. Conference Food: If you are forced to eat banquet food, here are the pitfalls: the dessert is sometimes placed on the table before you sit down. These desserts are rarely worth the calories. Ask the nearest server to take it away or just walk it to the back of the banquet hall and put it in the garbage. Banquet food is loaded with cheap starches like rice and noodles. Avoid these like the plague, they are soaked in fat! It's better for you to just eat the meat and veg. I always ask what the vegetarian option is, sometimes it's a better option than the regular menu--however usually it is some sort of starch drowning in sauce, like fettuccine Alfredo. Also, ask for more salad, most servers will hook you up with another one if you ask nicely. Finally, scrape off the sauce and dip your meat into it. It tastes just as good, and you probably save yourself 100 calories by not eating all of the sauce.
Here is what I have learned since December: I can never go back to eating the way I used to eat, but I don't have to be on a diet all the time. These strategies are good for anyone who wants to eat healthfully most of the time. I am moving into a mentality that it is okay for me to splurge once in a while, but to not view every special occasion as an opportunity to splurge.
The numbers:
Starting weight 235
Current weight 155
Goal weight: mmm....working on that!
Inner goal: peace.
Outer goal: Run the Nike 1/2 Marathon!
See you soon!
Sunday, April 17, 2011
What's in Goal? A Midnight Torture By Any Other Name...
So on March 30th I woke up at 4 A.M....again. It was the fourth time that week. I clutched my stomach, because I had woken up thinking I had gained back all the weight I lost. Tossing and turning, I felt so sad and angry with myself. Here I was, over a year after my weight loss journey had started, and I was STILL ten pounds from my goal weight. I spent February taking my diet down to the minimal amount of calories. I weighed myself three times a day. I did everything I could think of. Injury had side-lined me from serious exercise, and I just felt lost. Then the binging started. Once or twice a week in March I would binge (in fact I wrote about it here). I was up to 151. I was overweight, again. I felt like the worst failure in the world. I just wanted to melt into my bed and disappear. I felt like when people looked at me, they saw what I phony I was...how hopelessly out of control and stupid. I clutched my stomach and faced the abyss: what am I? Am I just a worthless lump if I do not make my goal? My heart screamed yes, yes, yes! However, my mind said: NO! I needed help. I needed to reach out. I needed to get a handle on what had ceased being a diet and had become a way to punish myself for something that I always thought was secretly true: that I am just not worth anything.
The upcoming weekend was Wondercon (it's a comic book convention in San Francisco), so I knew there were two ways I go approach the con. I could agonize over every bite or I could use it as an opportunity to relax and learn to eat like a woman on vacation. That's what I did. I ate. I didn't overeat, I didn't under eat. I ate chocolate, drank alcohol, and ate things without asking for nutritional information first. Yes, I gained almost ten pounds over three days! However, I lost it all the following week by eating sensibly and getting some minimal exercise.
The break I got a Wondercon did a lot for me. I felt free to reach out and talk things out. I started to talk to friends about how depressed I was about my lack of progress and my self destructive behavior. I started opening up first to my Saturday walking buddy, then my other walking buddies, my TOPS friends, and my husband. All of them, even my mom (who worries endlessly about my weight loss--sorry mom, but it's true!) encouraged me to rethink my goal. I had let this number control my mood and actions for far too long! They all saw something I didn't.
Finally, the Weight Recorder at my TOPS chapter said to me: "Look at your numbers! Your body wants to be around 150-155. You've been through so much this year, let your body rest. These last ten pounds can wait." I started to cry...giving up my goal would be letting everyone down. I just thought that I needed to get there so that others would not think I was a loser!
Now, I realize that I cannot do all the things I need to do: train for a marathon, return to graduate school, raise a child, and rehab my leg...while obsessing on this goal!
So, I told my husband this morning: I am revising my goal to 150. Maybe I will change it in the future, but for now 150 is good. This resolution is not what I had in mind, but perhaps my doctor knew something I didn't when she first suggested 150 as a goal for me. The bottom line is I need the psychological rest. So, I am taking it!
This morning I weighed in at 155.8, so I know that, if I don't get a handle on my emotions around my body and my spirit, that I will regain all the weight that I lost. As my husband said this morning, a physical goal is better than an arbitrary number. My new goal is to run/walk a 1/2 marathon in October. Tomorrow, I start training.
Wish me luck!
The numbers:
Starting Weight 235
Current Weight: 156
There is only one goal: self love--whatever that means to me right now.
The upcoming weekend was Wondercon (it's a comic book convention in San Francisco), so I knew there were two ways I go approach the con. I could agonize over every bite or I could use it as an opportunity to relax and learn to eat like a woman on vacation. That's what I did. I ate. I didn't overeat, I didn't under eat. I ate chocolate, drank alcohol, and ate things without asking for nutritional information first. Yes, I gained almost ten pounds over three days! However, I lost it all the following week by eating sensibly and getting some minimal exercise.
The break I got a Wondercon did a lot for me. I felt free to reach out and talk things out. I started to talk to friends about how depressed I was about my lack of progress and my self destructive behavior. I started opening up first to my Saturday walking buddy, then my other walking buddies, my TOPS friends, and my husband. All of them, even my mom (who worries endlessly about my weight loss--sorry mom, but it's true!) encouraged me to rethink my goal. I had let this number control my mood and actions for far too long! They all saw something I didn't.
Finally, the Weight Recorder at my TOPS chapter said to me: "Look at your numbers! Your body wants to be around 150-155. You've been through so much this year, let your body rest. These last ten pounds can wait." I started to cry...giving up my goal would be letting everyone down. I just thought that I needed to get there so that others would not think I was a loser!
Now, I realize that I cannot do all the things I need to do: train for a marathon, return to graduate school, raise a child, and rehab my leg...while obsessing on this goal!
So, I told my husband this morning: I am revising my goal to 150. Maybe I will change it in the future, but for now 150 is good. This resolution is not what I had in mind, but perhaps my doctor knew something I didn't when she first suggested 150 as a goal for me. The bottom line is I need the psychological rest. So, I am taking it!
This morning I weighed in at 155.8, so I know that, if I don't get a handle on my emotions around my body and my spirit, that I will regain all the weight that I lost. As my husband said this morning, a physical goal is better than an arbitrary number. My new goal is to run/walk a 1/2 marathon in October. Tomorrow, I start training.
Wish me luck!
The numbers:
Starting Weight 235
Current Weight: 156
There is only one goal: self love--whatever that means to me right now.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Reflections on the Recession and Weight Loss
Burgh, bleh, meh, sheesh...
These are the words escaping my mouth as I have once again lost the three pounds I have gained from my last "day off."
This morning, as I was walking to my classroom, I really had to dig down deep. What is causing me to stay rooted firmly in the 147-150 range. It's not so much the weight anymore, as I am "normal" (whatever that means) now. What's concerning me is lapsing back into bad, bad habits. The stress eating, the mindless eating, the lack of exercsise. All the stuff that got me overweight and to this blog in the first place!
I am stressed out. We are going through a lot in my school district right now, and I am facing some difficult personal choices because of it. I am working more for less, and it is taking its toll. I think, subconsciously, I am soothing myself with food. Maybe you are in the same boat--facing layoffs or friends getting laid off. Maybe you are facing another pay cut and have realized that the cheapest food you can buy is also fattening (which is depressing). I know it sounds strange, but the tough times we are facing can affect your waistline.
For example, I no longer buy things at full price at the grocery store. My shopping list is entirely dictated by what's on sale. Well, guess what? My favorite fruits and veggies are not on sale a whole lot! I have sucked it up and tried new stuff, but it means that I eat more calories of other things when I don't like them. Also, have you noticed that the sale items for carbohydrate heavy foods such as pasta, bread, and rice are always the stuff with the most sugar and salt added? Sigh. Why is it the most fattening meat is always the cheapest? Double and triple sigh. It sucks that I only get to eat 2 oz of pork shoulder but 3 oz of tenderloin.
So, this is what I have done. I make a "sacred" list of staples. Sale or not, I know I need that food. If it is not on sale, stuff not on that list does not get bought. For example, if the cottage cheese and yogurt is not on sale, I do not buy Skinny Cow ice cream treats. EVEN IF THE SKINNY COWS ARE ON SALE. That kind of thing. Also, I now look in the frozen section for my non-seasonal fruits and veggies (great for you berry lovers!).
Also, have "go to" foods does help when I have to serve my family something inexpensive but WAY off my food plan. I can make an omelet or a tofu dish and know that I am okay. For example, I made pulled pork last night. Um...I could eat five pounds of that! So, I had my portion, but then ate some Greek yogurt with blueberries for dessert. The protein from the Greek yogurt made up for the small portion of pork, and it filled me up. Yay! Yes, I would have liked to eat the rest of the leftovers (I'll be honest, I did munch on two ounces before I put them away), but it does help to have something I can eat in lieu of something I can't really eat. All in all, I stayed well within my calorie count for the day.
I think the hardest part about dieting during the recession is all the stress. You are anxious and worried, yet there is no going shopping or getting your nails done or whatever to have fun. You have to find fun at home. You may also have to find an inexpensive way to exercise, as a gym membership is out of reach for many. I am lucky, I have a free gym at my apartment building. I also walk my local lake every Saturday and walk with friends on Sundays. However, there are many things you can do inside, if the weather is bad, for free.
To wit. Did you you know that you can rent exercise videos from the library for free? Yep! Did you know if you do a plank (which is the position you start a push up in) for three minutes you burn an AMAZING amount of calories? Did you know if you sit up straight in a chair and do bicep curls and pull downs with two bottles of water you are burning calories? You can Google tons of exercises online that you can do while watching television!
What about support? I have joined a non-profit weight loss support group (TOPS), but you can do a meet up, join SparkPeople, whatever. There are so many free/inexpensive weight loss support groups out there. You don't need to pay a lot of money to lose weight.
At any rate, I am weathering the recession storm as best that I can. I think my waistline is too. If you have any great suggestions, please email me, and I will pass them on!
Hang tough everyone!
The numbers:
Starting Weight: 235
Current Weight: 149
Goal Weight:140
The Goals:
Outer Goal: Be at my goal weight for State Recognition Days for TOPS!
Inner Goal: To be the woman everyone else thinks I am!
See you soon!
These are the words escaping my mouth as I have once again lost the three pounds I have gained from my last "day off."
This morning, as I was walking to my classroom, I really had to dig down deep. What is causing me to stay rooted firmly in the 147-150 range. It's not so much the weight anymore, as I am "normal" (whatever that means) now. What's concerning me is lapsing back into bad, bad habits. The stress eating, the mindless eating, the lack of exercsise. All the stuff that got me overweight and to this blog in the first place!
I am stressed out. We are going through a lot in my school district right now, and I am facing some difficult personal choices because of it. I am working more for less, and it is taking its toll. I think, subconsciously, I am soothing myself with food. Maybe you are in the same boat--facing layoffs or friends getting laid off. Maybe you are facing another pay cut and have realized that the cheapest food you can buy is also fattening (which is depressing). I know it sounds strange, but the tough times we are facing can affect your waistline.
For example, I no longer buy things at full price at the grocery store. My shopping list is entirely dictated by what's on sale. Well, guess what? My favorite fruits and veggies are not on sale a whole lot! I have sucked it up and tried new stuff, but it means that I eat more calories of other things when I don't like them. Also, have you noticed that the sale items for carbohydrate heavy foods such as pasta, bread, and rice are always the stuff with the most sugar and salt added? Sigh. Why is it the most fattening meat is always the cheapest? Double and triple sigh. It sucks that I only get to eat 2 oz of pork shoulder but 3 oz of tenderloin.
So, this is what I have done. I make a "sacred" list of staples. Sale or not, I know I need that food. If it is not on sale, stuff not on that list does not get bought. For example, if the cottage cheese and yogurt is not on sale, I do not buy Skinny Cow ice cream treats. EVEN IF THE SKINNY COWS ARE ON SALE. That kind of thing. Also, I now look in the frozen section for my non-seasonal fruits and veggies (great for you berry lovers!).
Also, have "go to" foods does help when I have to serve my family something inexpensive but WAY off my food plan. I can make an omelet or a tofu dish and know that I am okay. For example, I made pulled pork last night. Um...I could eat five pounds of that! So, I had my portion, but then ate some Greek yogurt with blueberries for dessert. The protein from the Greek yogurt made up for the small portion of pork, and it filled me up. Yay! Yes, I would have liked to eat the rest of the leftovers (I'll be honest, I did munch on two ounces before I put them away), but it does help to have something I can eat in lieu of something I can't really eat. All in all, I stayed well within my calorie count for the day.
I think the hardest part about dieting during the recession is all the stress. You are anxious and worried, yet there is no going shopping or getting your nails done or whatever to have fun. You have to find fun at home. You may also have to find an inexpensive way to exercise, as a gym membership is out of reach for many. I am lucky, I have a free gym at my apartment building. I also walk my local lake every Saturday and walk with friends on Sundays. However, there are many things you can do inside, if the weather is bad, for free.
To wit. Did you you know that you can rent exercise videos from the library for free? Yep! Did you know if you do a plank (which is the position you start a push up in) for three minutes you burn an AMAZING amount of calories? Did you know if you sit up straight in a chair and do bicep curls and pull downs with two bottles of water you are burning calories? You can Google tons of exercises online that you can do while watching television!
What about support? I have joined a non-profit weight loss support group (TOPS), but you can do a meet up, join SparkPeople, whatever. There are so many free/inexpensive weight loss support groups out there. You don't need to pay a lot of money to lose weight.
At any rate, I am weathering the recession storm as best that I can. I think my waistline is too. If you have any great suggestions, please email me, and I will pass them on!
Hang tough everyone!
The numbers:
Starting Weight: 235
Current Weight: 149
Goal Weight:140
The Goals:
Outer Goal: Be at my goal weight for State Recognition Days for TOPS!
Inner Goal: To be the woman everyone else thinks I am!
See you soon!
Friday, March 4, 2011
Reflections on A Year of Weight Loss
Next Wednesday marks my one year anniversary with the Kaiser Medical Weight Loss Program. To say that I am reflecting on "all I've gained and lost" is an understatement. I am still hovering around 147, and, truthfully, I am disappointed with not reaching my goal weight. I know it is wrong to compare myself to others, but it is difficult seeing people on television doing what I cannot seem to do.
Lately, I have also been struggling with getting exercise and with eating too much. It's as if part of me is just unwilling to let these last few pounds go, what goes with it if they are gone? I am grappling with figuring out a new identity as a "thin" person (though I am not very thin, truth be told--just average). My entire life from the age of ten has been dictated by my weight. My weight has never been good enough. I have striven to excel to overcome the disadvantages my excess weight caused (believe me--it sucks to be fat in our society!).
On the flip side of these worried musings are the achievements I have made. Now exercise is fun for me; I want to do it. This morning, I threw on a pair of size 8 jeans without having to suck in my belly. I made a delicious egg white and veggie omelet with cheese and toast for breakfast; knowing that it was a breakfast that would fuel my body and brain. Most importantly--okay don't laugh--I BENT OVER AND PICKED SOMETHING OFF THE FLOOR WITHOUT PAIN OR SHORTNESS OF BREATH!
However, my most important achievement, in my mind, is the impact I have made on others. There is no denying it, as much as I would like to, that my weight loss has been a motivating for other people. My husband directly credits me for his 80 pound weight loss, my mom and mother-in-law have both said that my support has helped them. My friends, strangers, and acquaintances have all asked me "what did you do?" When I tell them, I tell them they can do it too. I helped train people for a marathon, for Pete's sake! The truth of the matter is that these people have all made their own changes and are responsible for their own success, my achievement is that I supported them in their goals. Of that, I am very, very proud.
As a new weight loss year begins, it is entirely possible that it will take a year for me to lose this next seven pounds. One of things I have gained this past year is the knowledge that good health and well being is a life long pursuit. If it takes me a year, fine, because it will take the rest of my life to keep it off.
I am looking forward to the challenge.
Okay...the numbers:
Starting Weight December 2008: 236
Starting Weight MWL March 2010: 224
Current Weight: 147
Goal Weight 140
Outward Goal: To wear a bikini this summer
Inner Goal: To find the strength to be a strength to others....and of course, WORLD PEACE!
Hugs to you all! See you soon!
Lately, I have also been struggling with getting exercise and with eating too much. It's as if part of me is just unwilling to let these last few pounds go, what goes with it if they are gone? I am grappling with figuring out a new identity as a "thin" person (though I am not very thin, truth be told--just average). My entire life from the age of ten has been dictated by my weight. My weight has never been good enough. I have striven to excel to overcome the disadvantages my excess weight caused (believe me--it sucks to be fat in our society!).
On the flip side of these worried musings are the achievements I have made. Now exercise is fun for me; I want to do it. This morning, I threw on a pair of size 8 jeans without having to suck in my belly. I made a delicious egg white and veggie omelet with cheese and toast for breakfast; knowing that it was a breakfast that would fuel my body and brain. Most importantly--okay don't laugh--I BENT OVER AND PICKED SOMETHING OFF THE FLOOR WITHOUT PAIN OR SHORTNESS OF BREATH!
However, my most important achievement, in my mind, is the impact I have made on others. There is no denying it, as much as I would like to, that my weight loss has been a motivating for other people. My husband directly credits me for his 80 pound weight loss, my mom and mother-in-law have both said that my support has helped them. My friends, strangers, and acquaintances have all asked me "what did you do?" When I tell them, I tell them they can do it too. I helped train people for a marathon, for Pete's sake! The truth of the matter is that these people have all made their own changes and are responsible for their own success, my achievement is that I supported them in their goals. Of that, I am very, very proud.
As a new weight loss year begins, it is entirely possible that it will take a year for me to lose this next seven pounds. One of things I have gained this past year is the knowledge that good health and well being is a life long pursuit. If it takes me a year, fine, because it will take the rest of my life to keep it off.
I am looking forward to the challenge.
Okay...the numbers:
Starting Weight December 2008: 236
Starting Weight MWL March 2010: 224
Current Weight: 147
Goal Weight 140
Outward Goal: To wear a bikini this summer
Inner Goal: To find the strength to be a strength to others....and of course, WORLD PEACE!
Hugs to you all! See you soon!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Struggle...Struggle...Fret...Fret...
What was the single most important thing I learned while on Optifast? Nutrition? Nope! Self discipline. Yet, as my one year anniversary with the Kaiser Medical Weight Loss program looms, I find my self discipline waning and temptations to be more and more tempting.
Especially recently.
Perhaps it is my heart, perhaps it is the weather, but I have been binging on sugar like it is no one's business! Last Friday it was soooo bad, that I put myself in the Emergency Room! (My body is hyper-sensitive with the pacemaker; so the sugar literally made me sick!)
After last's nights debacle with the Girl Scout cookies (5 Thin Mints, 3 Somoas, and 4 Lemon Chalet Creams), I spent some time this morning thinking about why. Why am I doing this to myself? Then, I flashed on last night's Biggest Loser, when Hannah weighed in at 201. She was about to break a barrier that had eluded her for a long time. She didn't look happy; she looked scared. I thought to myself, "This binge started when I got within 3 pounds of my goal weight!" I realized I was scared of making my goal, of what it would mean.
I realized it would mean I was done with this enormous endeavor that has given me so much positive self esteem, amazing friends, and a whole new outlook!
I realized it would mean I was no longer special. (That amazing Trav who lost all the weight!)
I realized that it would mean I would have to accept the fact that my exercise has to continue, even though I do not get the extrinsic reward of the scale going down.
I realized that it would mean success--something I have a hard time accepting. I don't like thinking of myself as successful, because I secretly think that I am never good enough for anything.
The great thing about Optifast is that you learn tools to help you get through these times. I mean, if you can eat not so delicious food for four months, you can do almost anything, right?
So, I applied the tools I learned while on product to these past couple of days to help me not go down a very dangerous path. The first thing that I have been doing to help mitigate and manage my binges (so, I do not land in the hospital again and address them head on) is to give myself a time limit. I will not eat anything past X time. I also write EVERYTHING down, so at least I can keep myself accountable. These techniques don't stop me from eating sugary snacks, but at least I am owning what is going in my mouth instead of ignoring it.
Today, I am reimplementing my personal eating rules: no snacks other than the ones I pack. No sugar Monday-Thursday. What I love about life is that everyday is a new day to treat yourself right! I will let you know if returning to stricter eating patterns helps me to avoid the binges!
I would love to be at my goal weight by March 7th--my anniversary with MWL. Let me know how you prevent or manage eating bad, bad stuff!
Okay...here are the numbers!
Starting weight: 234
Current weight: 147
Goal weight: 140
The goals:
Inner goal: staying in touch with the moment!
Outer goal: crossing the finish line at a half marathon!
Talk to you guys soon!
Especially recently.
Perhaps it is my heart, perhaps it is the weather, but I have been binging on sugar like it is no one's business! Last Friday it was soooo bad, that I put myself in the Emergency Room! (My body is hyper-sensitive with the pacemaker; so the sugar literally made me sick!)
After last's nights debacle with the Girl Scout cookies (5 Thin Mints, 3 Somoas, and 4 Lemon Chalet Creams), I spent some time this morning thinking about why. Why am I doing this to myself? Then, I flashed on last night's Biggest Loser, when Hannah weighed in at 201. She was about to break a barrier that had eluded her for a long time. She didn't look happy; she looked scared. I thought to myself, "This binge started when I got within 3 pounds of my goal weight!" I realized I was scared of making my goal, of what it would mean.
I realized it would mean I was done with this enormous endeavor that has given me so much positive self esteem, amazing friends, and a whole new outlook!
I realized it would mean I was no longer special. (That amazing Trav who lost all the weight!)
I realized that it would mean I would have to accept the fact that my exercise has to continue, even though I do not get the extrinsic reward of the scale going down.
I realized that it would mean success--something I have a hard time accepting. I don't like thinking of myself as successful, because I secretly think that I am never good enough for anything.
The great thing about Optifast is that you learn tools to help you get through these times. I mean, if you can eat not so delicious food for four months, you can do almost anything, right?
So, I applied the tools I learned while on product to these past couple of days to help me not go down a very dangerous path. The first thing that I have been doing to help mitigate and manage my binges (so, I do not land in the hospital again and address them head on) is to give myself a time limit. I will not eat anything past X time. I also write EVERYTHING down, so at least I can keep myself accountable. These techniques don't stop me from eating sugary snacks, but at least I am owning what is going in my mouth instead of ignoring it.
Today, I am reimplementing my personal eating rules: no snacks other than the ones I pack. No sugar Monday-Thursday. What I love about life is that everyday is a new day to treat yourself right! I will let you know if returning to stricter eating patterns helps me to avoid the binges!
I would love to be at my goal weight by March 7th--my anniversary with MWL. Let me know how you prevent or manage eating bad, bad stuff!
Okay...here are the numbers!
Starting weight: 234
Current weight: 147
Goal weight: 140
The goals:
Inner goal: staying in touch with the moment!
Outer goal: crossing the finish line at a half marathon!
Talk to you guys soon!
Monday, February 7, 2011
The last ten pounds...
So, I finally weighed in at Kaiser for the first time since Christmas. Why? You may ask, did it take so, so, so very long! The answer: mysterious health problems!
So, ever since December 24th, the day of my big Christmas Eve bash (where I cooked amazingly delicious food! I will link the recipes on my recipe page!), I have been feeling run down and bad. In fact, I collapsed at school. I was so excited, the new me--healthy, fit, training for marathons for Pete's sake, was no longer a victim to her own bad habits. It turns out that Mother Nature had a different idea!
So, apparently, my heart started slowing down. After I lost all my weight, my resting heart rate was between 42-48 BPM, slow yes, but I was doing a lot of cardio! Then, at my hernia surgery in October, it was 36 BPM. Kaiser was worried, but since I was doing OK, they said they would keep an eye on things. By January, my BPM was 31 and dropping like a stone. By January 26, I could barely walk my usual 5K with my walking buddies! I almost passed out at the end! Finally, on January 28, during my Electrocardiogram, the technician suggested I go to the ER. My BPM had dropped to 27. That night, they put in my pacemaker.
The irony is that my excess weight was artificially raising my BPM and my blood pressure. So, I wouldn't have a pacemaker if I were still 235. However, I did avoid other health issues, and since this condition is genetic, I may have had to deal with it eventually while in poor health and at higher risk during surgery.
So, here is the kicker...I hadn't really lost any weight since my hernia surgery. Yes, I would fluctuate up and down, but these last ten pounds seem to be crawling off. Even my husband was perplexed; he couldn't figure out why someone who eats healthfully, low-cal, and exercises would suddenly gain five pounds for no discernible reason. Then I would lose 5.25 pounds the following week. It was the most frustrating three months of my life. It's one thing to loose .5 pounds in a month, it's another thing to wake up and be three pounds heavier than the day before, even though your habits have not changed! Yes, the net was a loss, but the dramatic fluctuations were taking a toll on me psychologically.
I sank into a deep depression. At one point, I just threw up my hands and starting eating whatever I wanted. It didn't seem to make that much of a difference, in all honesty! I still tracked everything; I just wasn't as strict. All that happened was that I gained four pounds. At one point, my family and friends started to really notice how down and low energy I was. I felt like no amount of sleep would help, and I dropped two of my exercise days out of my schedule. I was just too exhausted to wake up and go work out. So, of course, the lower exercise meant that my weight loss stopped.
During my last post, you can see that I really was trying to get back on track, but I seemed cursed by mysterious health problems. My sciatic nerve was acting up, I had shortness of breath, you name it! All those issues led me to the operating room and my new, mechanical heart.
So, what happened? Since my pacemaker was put in, I have lost three pounds! I lost five pounds the first week, but I was pretty dehydrated, so a lot was water. My husband thinks that my low heart rate was suppressing my metabolic rate, and my body was undergoing so much stress, it was reluctant to shed any pounds. Indeed, I have walked twice since my surgery, and have felt tired but good (not like I am going to pass out!). My goal is to get my walking mileage up, then start running again in March--after my doctor clears me of course!
I think, sometimes, those of us who lose weight think that it will solve many (if not all) of our problems. Secretly, I thought that once I lost weight, I would never have to worry about my health again. I felt invincible and in control. As we all know, when you feel like nothing can touch you, that's when life shows you otherwise. The best thing I learned from this whole experience is that it is important to stick to your goals, even when things are not going well. I leaned on my husband for support, trying stay on track. When I fell off, I took the next day seriously--really being honest with myself and my feelings. It was hard, hard, hard. However, I really don't want to be overweight again.
These last ten pounds...they will come off, but my life will still be there. I will still be here, and after last week, I am very, very grateful for that!
Okay...here are the goals:
Inner goal: personal honesty
Outer goal: Catherine Deneuve in Cat People!
The numbers:
Starting weight: 234
Current weight: 146.5
Goal weight: 140
See you guys soon!
So, ever since December 24th, the day of my big Christmas Eve bash (where I cooked amazingly delicious food! I will link the recipes on my recipe page!), I have been feeling run down and bad. In fact, I collapsed at school. I was so excited, the new me--healthy, fit, training for marathons for Pete's sake, was no longer a victim to her own bad habits. It turns out that Mother Nature had a different idea!
So, apparently, my heart started slowing down. After I lost all my weight, my resting heart rate was between 42-48 BPM, slow yes, but I was doing a lot of cardio! Then, at my hernia surgery in October, it was 36 BPM. Kaiser was worried, but since I was doing OK, they said they would keep an eye on things. By January, my BPM was 31 and dropping like a stone. By January 26, I could barely walk my usual 5K with my walking buddies! I almost passed out at the end! Finally, on January 28, during my Electrocardiogram, the technician suggested I go to the ER. My BPM had dropped to 27. That night, they put in my pacemaker.
The irony is that my excess weight was artificially raising my BPM and my blood pressure. So, I wouldn't have a pacemaker if I were still 235. However, I did avoid other health issues, and since this condition is genetic, I may have had to deal with it eventually while in poor health and at higher risk during surgery.
So, here is the kicker...I hadn't really lost any weight since my hernia surgery. Yes, I would fluctuate up and down, but these last ten pounds seem to be crawling off. Even my husband was perplexed; he couldn't figure out why someone who eats healthfully, low-cal, and exercises would suddenly gain five pounds for no discernible reason. Then I would lose 5.25 pounds the following week. It was the most frustrating three months of my life. It's one thing to loose .5 pounds in a month, it's another thing to wake up and be three pounds heavier than the day before, even though your habits have not changed! Yes, the net was a loss, but the dramatic fluctuations were taking a toll on me psychologically.
I sank into a deep depression. At one point, I just threw up my hands and starting eating whatever I wanted. It didn't seem to make that much of a difference, in all honesty! I still tracked everything; I just wasn't as strict. All that happened was that I gained four pounds. At one point, my family and friends started to really notice how down and low energy I was. I felt like no amount of sleep would help, and I dropped two of my exercise days out of my schedule. I was just too exhausted to wake up and go work out. So, of course, the lower exercise meant that my weight loss stopped.
During my last post, you can see that I really was trying to get back on track, but I seemed cursed by mysterious health problems. My sciatic nerve was acting up, I had shortness of breath, you name it! All those issues led me to the operating room and my new, mechanical heart.
So, what happened? Since my pacemaker was put in, I have lost three pounds! I lost five pounds the first week, but I was pretty dehydrated, so a lot was water. My husband thinks that my low heart rate was suppressing my metabolic rate, and my body was undergoing so much stress, it was reluctant to shed any pounds. Indeed, I have walked twice since my surgery, and have felt tired but good (not like I am going to pass out!). My goal is to get my walking mileage up, then start running again in March--after my doctor clears me of course!
I think, sometimes, those of us who lose weight think that it will solve many (if not all) of our problems. Secretly, I thought that once I lost weight, I would never have to worry about my health again. I felt invincible and in control. As we all know, when you feel like nothing can touch you, that's when life shows you otherwise. The best thing I learned from this whole experience is that it is important to stick to your goals, even when things are not going well. I leaned on my husband for support, trying stay on track. When I fell off, I took the next day seriously--really being honest with myself and my feelings. It was hard, hard, hard. However, I really don't want to be overweight again.
These last ten pounds...they will come off, but my life will still be there. I will still be here, and after last week, I am very, very grateful for that!
Okay...here are the goals:
Inner goal: personal honesty
Outer goal: Catherine Deneuve in Cat People!
The numbers:
Starting weight: 234
Current weight: 146.5
Goal weight: 140
See you guys soon!
Monday, January 3, 2011
Post Christmas Update--Sugar Shame Spiral!
Well...the Holidays are finally over! I don't know about you, but it was certainly difficult passing up all the goodies. I did well most of December, but gave in to temptation over vacation! As a result, my weight wildly fluctuated the last two weeks, culminating in this morning's tragic weigh in!
Things about sugar that I did not know before vacation and now I do:
1. The insulin spike that sugar causes also causes you to retain sodium and, therefore, water.
2. Sugar is a self perpetuating snack--meaning that it tricks your body into thinking you need to eat more sugar after you have something sweet--even if it is a non-sugar sweetener.
3. Insulin spikes cause glycerol to chemical bond to lipids, then transports those lipids to your fat cells (triglycerides, they're called). Triglycerides are difficult to breakdown and transport out of a fat cell. So, lots of sugar means lots and lots of extra poundage!
Things that help mitigate insulin spikes:
1. Not eating processed sugars or grains.
2. Eating sugar with fiber (i.e. whole fruits or grains)
3. Eating sugar with protein (eat some turkey with that cookie!)
How to recover from a Sugar Shame Spiral:
1. Write everything down in your journal, so you know what you are eating and what your triggers are.
2. Drink LOTS OF WATER and herbal tea (I enjoy Smooth Move, since it helps the GI tract. Peppermint is good too!).
3. Eat leafy green veggies and protein --avoid sugary foods--even fruit and lactose--for a day or two. Let your body manage the excess sugar you've put into it.
4. Don't give into negative feelings. It's just food, not a moral crisis. Eat well and love yourself!
The Goals:
Inner Goal: Go into Shame Recovery...and WORLD PEACE!
Outer Goal: Still shooting for Heidi Klum...a girl can dream!
The Numbers:
Starting Weight: 224
Current Weight: 150
Goal Weight: 140
Things about sugar that I did not know before vacation and now I do:
1. The insulin spike that sugar causes also causes you to retain sodium and, therefore, water.
2. Sugar is a self perpetuating snack--meaning that it tricks your body into thinking you need to eat more sugar after you have something sweet--even if it is a non-sugar sweetener.
3. Insulin spikes cause glycerol to chemical bond to lipids, then transports those lipids to your fat cells (triglycerides, they're called). Triglycerides are difficult to breakdown and transport out of a fat cell. So, lots of sugar means lots and lots of extra poundage!
Things that help mitigate insulin spikes:
1. Not eating processed sugars or grains.
2. Eating sugar with fiber (i.e. whole fruits or grains)
3. Eating sugar with protein (eat some turkey with that cookie!)
How to recover from a Sugar Shame Spiral:
1. Write everything down in your journal, so you know what you are eating and what your triggers are.
2. Drink LOTS OF WATER and herbal tea (I enjoy Smooth Move, since it helps the GI tract. Peppermint is good too!).
3. Eat leafy green veggies and protein --avoid sugary foods--even fruit and lactose--for a day or two. Let your body manage the excess sugar you've put into it.
4. Don't give into negative feelings. It's just food, not a moral crisis. Eat well and love yourself!
The Goals:
Inner Goal: Go into Shame Recovery...and WORLD PEACE!
Outer Goal: Still shooting for Heidi Klum...a girl can dream!
The Numbers:
Starting Weight: 224
Current Weight: 150
Goal Weight: 140
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Checking In and....HELLO the HOLIDAYS!
Update:
So, I've gotten a few emails about why I haven't written in a while. The short answer is that my MWL group hasn't met in a while!
No worries though, I have been steadily losing or maintaining my weight! I am currently hovering between 148-150. As we all know, the closer to your goal, the longer it takes.
Many people have also been asking me about my post-Optifast food plan. In general, I eat between 1200-1500 calories a day. Even on Thanksgiving, I did not go over 1650. Of those calories, I eat a minimum of 25 grams of fiber a day, but shoot for 35 grams. I also eat a minimum of five fruits and vegetables everyday--usually more. I eat four ounces of lean protein every day. I also eat three-four servings of non-fat dairy a day. I take a multi-vitamin, vitamin C and vitamin D everyday. 12 glasses of water, 8 of which AT MINIMUM is just water. I generally avoid sugar, butter, etc...but try to eat good fats to support brain health.
THIS FOOD PLAN IS ONE THAT I DEVELOPED IN CONJUNCTION WITH MY HEALTH PROFESSIONAL TEAM, PLEASE CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR ABOUT YOUR DIET. Please.
Basically, I treat everyday as a new day. I recommit myself to my program. I am training for a half marathon in February, so I train for that five days a week. (Feel free to be my friend on dailymile.com!) I also try to do one exercise class a week.
Sigh.... The Holidays....or....YAY! The Holidays!
So, you may ask...how did I get through Thanksgiving eating all day, what most people eat during the appetizer portion of the night? Good question! First of all, I ate breakfast, snack, and lunch. By the time dinner was ready, I was ready for dinner--not a huge feast. Although breakfast was a post walk brunch at a friends, where nothing was low fat except the fruit salad, I used my knowledge of portion size to eat healthfully and enjoy myself!
After the brunch (where I ate a 1/2 portion of the best quiche I have ever had!, 1 cup of fruit salad, and two tablespoons of regular honey greek yogurt), I looked everything up on my BlackBerry and wrote down the calories in my food journal. My attitude was this--I don't care what the calories are, I just want to write them down. I fully expected to eat far more calories than usual--I just wasn't going to eat whatever--I wanted to be careful! Lunch was my usual yogurt and veggie sandwich. Dinner was the--yes I said it---the low fat Thanksgiving my mother in law and I cooked up. So, slightly unfair advantage compared to my dieting friends in the trenches, but there are many things to eat at Christmas and Thanksgiving that are not fattening: roast turkey, roasted vegetables, and salad. No one is forcing anyone to eat mashed potatoes. You also don't have to eat a ton of something. One tablespoon of anything is fine, but don't eat 35 tablespoons. If you don't want to know the calorie count of something, you shouldn't eat it!
Okay...one more thing...dessert. If you love dessert, the way I love it, eat it! What is sooooo great is that if you skip all the stuff you really don't want to eat, like extra appetizers, seconds, etc...you can have your 350 calorie slice of pumpkin pie! Seriously, eat what you want--not what is put in front of you, or what are you are eating to look busy, or what you are eating to avoid talking to that weird third cousin who "jokingly" hits on you every year.
Needless to say, if you "drink it, ink it; you you bite it, write it." If you write everything down and it comes to 4,000 calories--at least you know! So, when the scale creeps up, you know why. Everyday is a new day. That's what is so wonderful about life!
The key to successful holidays is making your needs known and eliciting support for your goals. Tell friends and family that there need to be some options for you or offer to bring some. Your friends and family love you, and most of them will be more than willing to help you.
Here are the goals:
Inner goal: stop the self criticism and acknowledge my successes
Outer goal: to look fabulous at the annual Christmas Party!
Here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 225
Current weight: 149
Goal weight: 140
See you next time!
So, I've gotten a few emails about why I haven't written in a while. The short answer is that my MWL group hasn't met in a while!
No worries though, I have been steadily losing or maintaining my weight! I am currently hovering between 148-150. As we all know, the closer to your goal, the longer it takes.
Many people have also been asking me about my post-Optifast food plan. In general, I eat between 1200-1500 calories a day. Even on Thanksgiving, I did not go over 1650. Of those calories, I eat a minimum of 25 grams of fiber a day, but shoot for 35 grams. I also eat a minimum of five fruits and vegetables everyday--usually more. I eat four ounces of lean protein every day. I also eat three-four servings of non-fat dairy a day. I take a multi-vitamin, vitamin C and vitamin D everyday. 12 glasses of water, 8 of which AT MINIMUM is just water. I generally avoid sugar, butter, etc...but try to eat good fats to support brain health.
THIS FOOD PLAN IS ONE THAT I DEVELOPED IN CONJUNCTION WITH MY HEALTH PROFESSIONAL TEAM, PLEASE CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR ABOUT YOUR DIET. Please.
Basically, I treat everyday as a new day. I recommit myself to my program. I am training for a half marathon in February, so I train for that five days a week. (Feel free to be my friend on dailymile.com!) I also try to do one exercise class a week.
Sigh.... The Holidays....or....YAY! The Holidays!
So, you may ask...how did I get through Thanksgiving eating all day, what most people eat during the appetizer portion of the night? Good question! First of all, I ate breakfast, snack, and lunch. By the time dinner was ready, I was ready for dinner--not a huge feast. Although breakfast was a post walk brunch at a friends, where nothing was low fat except the fruit salad, I used my knowledge of portion size to eat healthfully and enjoy myself!
After the brunch (where I ate a 1/2 portion of the best quiche I have ever had!, 1 cup of fruit salad, and two tablespoons of regular honey greek yogurt), I looked everything up on my BlackBerry and wrote down the calories in my food journal. My attitude was this--I don't care what the calories are, I just want to write them down. I fully expected to eat far more calories than usual--I just wasn't going to eat whatever--I wanted to be careful! Lunch was my usual yogurt and veggie sandwich. Dinner was the--yes I said it---the low fat Thanksgiving my mother in law and I cooked up. So, slightly unfair advantage compared to my dieting friends in the trenches, but there are many things to eat at Christmas and Thanksgiving that are not fattening: roast turkey, roasted vegetables, and salad. No one is forcing anyone to eat mashed potatoes. You also don't have to eat a ton of something. One tablespoon of anything is fine, but don't eat 35 tablespoons. If you don't want to know the calorie count of something, you shouldn't eat it!
Okay...one more thing...dessert. If you love dessert, the way I love it, eat it! What is sooooo great is that if you skip all the stuff you really don't want to eat, like extra appetizers, seconds, etc...you can have your 350 calorie slice of pumpkin pie! Seriously, eat what you want--not what is put in front of you, or what are you are eating to look busy, or what you are eating to avoid talking to that weird third cousin who "jokingly" hits on you every year.
Needless to say, if you "drink it, ink it; you you bite it, write it." If you write everything down and it comes to 4,000 calories--at least you know! So, when the scale creeps up, you know why. Everyday is a new day. That's what is so wonderful about life!
The key to successful holidays is making your needs known and eliciting support for your goals. Tell friends and family that there need to be some options for you or offer to bring some. Your friends and family love you, and most of them will be more than willing to help you.
Here are the goals:
Inner goal: stop the self criticism and acknowledge my successes
Outer goal: to look fabulous at the annual Christmas Party!
Here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 225
Current weight: 149
Goal weight: 140
See you next time!
Friday, November 26, 2010
It's been a while...
So, it's been a while!
When my transition stopped, I wasn't really sure what to write about or if people would be interested. I am still losing weight, but it's fairly slow!
However, the coming and going of Thanksgiving got me in the mood to reflect and share what I've been thinking about.
When I woke up this morning, it was a good day! After days of staying the same weight, I am down a couple of pounds.
Friday, October 22, 2010
Surgery, Weight Loss, and Chocolate Pudding...
So, of course, right as I am trying to lose these last fifteen pounds, I have to go into a surgery to get my hernias fixed. That means weeks of little to no exercise, plus two weeks of forced inactivity with the constant temptation of chocolate pudding at every moment! Sigh. Double sigh.
Here's the kicker...when I went into surgery I was 156, next morning while I was in the Emergency Room for unexpected bleeding, I was 166.5. I almost burst into tears! It took me two months to lose those ten and half pounds, and now! now! now! THEY WERE ALL BACK! Thank goodness my mother was there to talk me off my psychological ledge. My mom assured me that it was all water, yadda, yadda, yadda....however all I felt was this buzzing in my head. However, moms are always right, and the weight came off over the next week.
Despite all the surgery drama, I still managed to lose four pounds since my last weigh in at Kaiser (which is now every two weeks). So, I have officially lost 70 pounds since March, which is pretty darn cool! Now, I am 14.5 pounds away from my goal weight, my fat percentage is in the "acceptable" range, and my BMI is close to normal.
Some interesting things I learned in my weight loss support groups these past few weeks:
Fiber is key. Apparently, if you eat 35 grams of fiber a day, it helps curb hunger and promotes weight loss.
It's really important to take one day at a time. One bad day or bad decision does not negate all your hard work.
It's okay to give yourself a break. It was hard for me to accept that I had to take time to heal. However, beating myself up because I couldn't exercise just makes exercise seem like an obligation, not something fun. Being positive helps you stay focused on what's important, taking care of yourself.
So...here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 154.5
Goal weight: 140
Goal time!
Outer goal: A young Ingrid Bergman...okay a middle-aged Ingrid Bergman!
Inner goal: To find the strength to walk my 5K on Halloween....and World Peace!
Here's the kicker...when I went into surgery I was 156, next morning while I was in the Emergency Room for unexpected bleeding, I was 166.5. I almost burst into tears! It took me two months to lose those ten and half pounds, and now! now! now! THEY WERE ALL BACK! Thank goodness my mother was there to talk me off my psychological ledge. My mom assured me that it was all water, yadda, yadda, yadda....however all I felt was this buzzing in my head. However, moms are always right, and the weight came off over the next week.
Despite all the surgery drama, I still managed to lose four pounds since my last weigh in at Kaiser (which is now every two weeks). So, I have officially lost 70 pounds since March, which is pretty darn cool! Now, I am 14.5 pounds away from my goal weight, my fat percentage is in the "acceptable" range, and my BMI is close to normal.
Some interesting things I learned in my weight loss support groups these past few weeks:
Fiber is key. Apparently, if you eat 35 grams of fiber a day, it helps curb hunger and promotes weight loss.
It's really important to take one day at a time. One bad day or bad decision does not negate all your hard work.
It's okay to give yourself a break. It was hard for me to accept that I had to take time to heal. However, beating myself up because I couldn't exercise just makes exercise seem like an obligation, not something fun. Being positive helps you stay focused on what's important, taking care of yourself.
So...here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 154.5
Goal weight: 140
Goal time!
Outer goal: A young Ingrid Bergman...okay a middle-aged Ingrid Bergman!
Inner goal: To find the strength to walk my 5K on Halloween....and World Peace!
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Maintenance?
So, my official maintenance period starts for my Medical Weight Loss Program! Yay!
However, I still want to lose 18 pounds, so I feel like I am still in my "transition" phase. The good news is that I lost 1/2 a pound since my last weigh in.
I've added 50-100 calories a day into my diet, and I am trying to reach a goal of 35 grams of fiber a day. So, far I am getting in 31-40 grams--yay! A friend turned me on to the Fiber 35 Diet, which I am not following to a "T," but certainly am inspired by. I am primarily adding in whole grains, to up the fiber and calories.
If any of you have tried this diet, let me know! I am curious how it has worked for you.
Okay, I am not complaining here, just commenting. I am seriously shocked at the enormous difference in sizes across different stores. I mean, I am officially still overweight, but I am a "Medium" for most of the discount stores. How can I be an "extra large" if I buy a pattern at the fabric store, but a "medium" at Target? Also, even numbered sizes seem to make no sense. I have size tens that are falling off of me, but 12's and 14's that still fit. It just seems so strange! I have heard of "vanity sizing," but this is ridiculous! I can't just pop into a store and trust that a "large" or 12 or whatever means anything! Okay, I lied...I am complaining! Guys, let's standardize a little, please! It's no fun being a "medium," if just means I am actually a large who has delusions of thinness!
At any rate, I am heading into surgery on Tuesday to fix my hernias (which this whole experience was supposed to help), so I am faced with two weeks of forced inactivity and boredom. Can we say weight loss landmine? Fortunately, my mom is here to help me out, so perhaps she will keep me away from my boredom eating. However, I am hoping to get lots of reading and writing done. It will be a great opportunity to update my recipes and write some poetry!
So, here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 235
Goal weight: 140
Current weight: 158
Goal time!
Inner goal: strength to avoid the fridge while recovering!
Outer goal: to be a true medium!
See you next week!
However, I still want to lose 18 pounds, so I feel like I am still in my "transition" phase. The good news is that I lost 1/2 a pound since my last weigh in.
I've added 50-100 calories a day into my diet, and I am trying to reach a goal of 35 grams of fiber a day. So, far I am getting in 31-40 grams--yay! A friend turned me on to the Fiber 35 Diet, which I am not following to a "T," but certainly am inspired by. I am primarily adding in whole grains, to up the fiber and calories.
If any of you have tried this diet, let me know! I am curious how it has worked for you.
Okay, I am not complaining here, just commenting. I am seriously shocked at the enormous difference in sizes across different stores. I mean, I am officially still overweight, but I am a "Medium" for most of the discount stores. How can I be an "extra large" if I buy a pattern at the fabric store, but a "medium" at Target? Also, even numbered sizes seem to make no sense. I have size tens that are falling off of me, but 12's and 14's that still fit. It just seems so strange! I have heard of "vanity sizing," but this is ridiculous! I can't just pop into a store and trust that a "large" or 12 or whatever means anything! Okay, I lied...I am complaining! Guys, let's standardize a little, please! It's no fun being a "medium," if just means I am actually a large who has delusions of thinness!
At any rate, I am heading into surgery on Tuesday to fix my hernias (which this whole experience was supposed to help), so I am faced with two weeks of forced inactivity and boredom. Can we say weight loss landmine? Fortunately, my mom is here to help me out, so perhaps she will keep me away from my boredom eating. However, I am hoping to get lots of reading and writing done. It will be a great opportunity to update my recipes and write some poetry!
So, here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 235
Goal weight: 140
Current weight: 158
Goal time!
Inner goal: strength to avoid the fridge while recovering!
Outer goal: to be a true medium!
See you next week!
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
The Last Meeting
It's been a long leg of my journey, but it ended on a high note. I lost a pound this week, but I lost 3.5 pounds of fat (woot!). I knew in this hot weather, I was retaining a lot of water. So, I was really worried about my final weigh in during the "weight loss" phase of my program.
Now for maintenence (sigh...the hardest part!)
For me, I am still trying to lose 19 more pounds. I readjusted my goal weight in consultation with my doctor. However, I am still amazed I got down to 159! However, I do feel as if I am beginning a new phase of my weight loss with the end of my Kaiser class.
I have many, many thoughts tonight--about success, failure, and the journey I have been on. The reality is, though, my primary thoughts linger on my classmates--my compatriots on this long journey. There is no doubt that their support and encouragement during these past 30 weeks has been instrumental in my personal success. I just want to take a moment to explain why these folks are so special.
We were thrown together by chance; we came from all walks of life. However, we all shared this one element in common: we felt oppresed by our bodies. Male, female, young (although the youngest of us was in her mid thirties) and old, we felt disconnected with the one person we should feel most connected to: ourselves- our SELF.
Every week (and I only ever missed one week!), these folks showed up and talked about their challenges and successes. Whatever success or failure I felt during the week was cheered on or comiserated by these people. I was inspired by so many people: the older woman who was losing weight to improve her health, a man who was challenged by simply walking. They showed up week after week, month after month--how could I not do the same?
Over our time together, these folks began to recognize the same thing I did--that our bodies are extensions of our souls and mind, and therefore deserve respect.
It's hard for me to believe that I have had 29 weeks of consecutive weight loss. There is no way, NO WAY I could have done it without support. My husband and child greeted me tonight with a card saying "congratulations!" I really should have done it for them--they tolerated my stress, my anger, my worry, my weird diet, all the meetings, changing their lifestyle--almost everything!-- for me.
One of the SMART skills is "Recruit support." The people in my Kaiser group, my family (especially my weight loss buddies: Mom in Law, Mom, and Hubby), my TOPS friends--these are the root of my strength. In a way, that is the best advice I can give anyone trying to make a major life change. Find people who believe, even more than you do, that you can achieve your goal.
Now my weekly meetings are ending and my bimonthly meetings are starting. My blog will continue on Fridays, instead of Wednesdays.
I will work on my recipe section to beef it up, and continue to add links. In addition, I will respond to any single email from someone who needs support. You are welcome--even if you are a stranger to me--to reach out and get a "kudo", or "atta boy", or "you can do it" from me.
Because, I KNOW we can...lose weight, be better with money, raise amazing kids, improve our world, and empower others if we do it together!
Here are the numbers:
Starting Weight: 224
Current Weight: 159
Goal Weight: 140
Goal Time:
Outer Goal: Looking good while running my 5K--bouncy pony tail and hot new duds!
Inner Goal: To share my strength and draw strength from others...and of course...WORLD PEACE!
See you next week!
Now for maintenence (sigh...the hardest part!)
For me, I am still trying to lose 19 more pounds. I readjusted my goal weight in consultation with my doctor. However, I am still amazed I got down to 159! However, I do feel as if I am beginning a new phase of my weight loss with the end of my Kaiser class.
I have many, many thoughts tonight--about success, failure, and the journey I have been on. The reality is, though, my primary thoughts linger on my classmates--my compatriots on this long journey. There is no doubt that their support and encouragement during these past 30 weeks has been instrumental in my personal success. I just want to take a moment to explain why these folks are so special.
We were thrown together by chance; we came from all walks of life. However, we all shared this one element in common: we felt oppresed by our bodies. Male, female, young (although the youngest of us was in her mid thirties) and old, we felt disconnected with the one person we should feel most connected to: ourselves- our SELF.
Every week (and I only ever missed one week!), these folks showed up and talked about their challenges and successes. Whatever success or failure I felt during the week was cheered on or comiserated by these people. I was inspired by so many people: the older woman who was losing weight to improve her health, a man who was challenged by simply walking. They showed up week after week, month after month--how could I not do the same?
Over our time together, these folks began to recognize the same thing I did--that our bodies are extensions of our souls and mind, and therefore deserve respect.
It's hard for me to believe that I have had 29 weeks of consecutive weight loss. There is no way, NO WAY I could have done it without support. My husband and child greeted me tonight with a card saying "congratulations!" I really should have done it for them--they tolerated my stress, my anger, my worry, my weird diet, all the meetings, changing their lifestyle--almost everything!-- for me.
One of the SMART skills is "Recruit support." The people in my Kaiser group, my family (especially my weight loss buddies: Mom in Law, Mom, and Hubby), my TOPS friends--these are the root of my strength. In a way, that is the best advice I can give anyone trying to make a major life change. Find people who believe, even more than you do, that you can achieve your goal.
Now my weekly meetings are ending and my bimonthly meetings are starting. My blog will continue on Fridays, instead of Wednesdays.
I will work on my recipe section to beef it up, and continue to add links. In addition, I will respond to any single email from someone who needs support. You are welcome--even if you are a stranger to me--to reach out and get a "kudo", or "atta boy", or "you can do it" from me.
Because, I KNOW we can...lose weight, be better with money, raise amazing kids, improve our world, and empower others if we do it together!
Here are the numbers:
Starting Weight: 224
Current Weight: 159
Goal Weight: 140
Goal Time:
Outer Goal: Looking good while running my 5K--bouncy pony tail and hot new duds!
Inner Goal: To share my strength and draw strength from others...and of course...WORLD PEACE!
See you next week!
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
First Milestone Reached!
Well...week 29 weigh in came and went! One pound lost; honestly, a whew not a woot! Now it seems the stakes are so high, since I have gone so long with just losses every week. I feel a little pressure now!
I had two milestones this week:
The first is the Biggest Loser. I have been watching this show for seven years, and every year I have been inspired by it. However, each year nothing happened except I gained weight. Last year on the season opener, I was the same weight as one of the contestants. It was so horrible to realize that I could be on the BIGGEST LOSER and not stand out! Last night, as I watching the season opener I realized that I was 74 pounds lighter than I was a year ago. (For my friends on FB, I did the math wrong last night!).
The second milestone is that I met my MWL goal weight: 160. For those of you reading this blog since the beginning, you know that was my goal weight in the beginning. It's hard to believe I actually made it!
Question of the week: What separates successful losers from not so successful? I have been thinking about this question for a couple of months. Not being truly either yet, and knowing the odds are against me (only 1% of people keep their weight loss off from a typical diet), I am genuinely curious about how to maintain my goal weight for life. Here are my initial thoughts:
1. In her book Rethinking Thin, Gina Kolata talks about how uniquely personal weight is. No insurance chart or doctor can tell you what weight you should actually be. Our notions of BMI and other things are based on statistical data, not impirical data. What's important is having a weight range--it's actually more helpful for you.
For example, my weight should be between 115-150, according to different charts. That's an enormous range. For me personally, my ideal weight will really be when my waist to hip ratio is lower than .8. I figured this will put me in the 135-145 pound range. So, my goal is 140. In fact, this weight was okay with my doctor, was a weight I felt beautiful at, and a weight I can maintain healthfully. Arbitrary numbers set us up for failure. A weight range allows for things such as aging, vacations, stress, etc... A range also, gives you a psychological limit--this is out of my range and I will do what it takes to stay there.
2. The second thing successful losers do is get support. As you all know, I joined two weight loss groups. The Kaiser group will end, but my Thursday group will be on going and provide the accountability I need to maintain my losses. It will also provide me with support if I go outside my range and help me get back on track. (My Thursday group is called TOPS.)
If you have any thoughts on this subject, please email me so I can post the ideas!
Now for the numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 160
Goal weight: 140
Goal time:
Outer Goal: I want to wear a pair of black skinny jeans with a sparky tank top!
Inner goal: strength to continue! (and world peace!)
I had two milestones this week:
The first is the Biggest Loser. I have been watching this show for seven years, and every year I have been inspired by it. However, each year nothing happened except I gained weight. Last year on the season opener, I was the same weight as one of the contestants. It was so horrible to realize that I could be on the BIGGEST LOSER and not stand out! Last night, as I watching the season opener I realized that I was 74 pounds lighter than I was a year ago. (For my friends on FB, I did the math wrong last night!).
The second milestone is that I met my MWL goal weight: 160. For those of you reading this blog since the beginning, you know that was my goal weight in the beginning. It's hard to believe I actually made it!
Question of the week: What separates successful losers from not so successful? I have been thinking about this question for a couple of months. Not being truly either yet, and knowing the odds are against me (only 1% of people keep their weight loss off from a typical diet), I am genuinely curious about how to maintain my goal weight for life. Here are my initial thoughts:
1. In her book Rethinking Thin, Gina Kolata talks about how uniquely personal weight is. No insurance chart or doctor can tell you what weight you should actually be. Our notions of BMI and other things are based on statistical data, not impirical data. What's important is having a weight range--it's actually more helpful for you.
For example, my weight should be between 115-150, according to different charts. That's an enormous range. For me personally, my ideal weight will really be when my waist to hip ratio is lower than .8. I figured this will put me in the 135-145 pound range. So, my goal is 140. In fact, this weight was okay with my doctor, was a weight I felt beautiful at, and a weight I can maintain healthfully. Arbitrary numbers set us up for failure. A weight range allows for things such as aging, vacations, stress, etc... A range also, gives you a psychological limit--this is out of my range and I will do what it takes to stay there.
2. The second thing successful losers do is get support. As you all know, I joined two weight loss groups. The Kaiser group will end, but my Thursday group will be on going and provide the accountability I need to maintain my losses. It will also provide me with support if I go outside my range and help me get back on track. (My Thursday group is called TOPS.)
If you have any thoughts on this subject, please email me so I can post the ideas!
Now for the numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 160
Goal weight: 140
Goal time:
Outer Goal: I want to wear a pair of black skinny jeans with a sparky tank top!
Inner goal: strength to continue! (and world peace!)
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
The Power of Positive Thinking...It's Not Just For the 1970's Anymore!
Okay...Week 27 of weight loss! Can I hear a what, what! Another pound down, my friends!
This week at my group we talked about an article by Jan Shepard called "What's Eating You: 5 Food Thoughts and Their Effects." This article really touched me, because I saw many of my own issues reflected there.
In summary, they are:
1. Polarized thinking: thinking that everything is either all or nothing or black and white. "I ate one cookie, why not eat the whole bag?"
2.Emotional reasoning: everything you feel must be true. "A person like me doesn't belong at the gym." or "No one will love me, because I am big and stupid.
3. Filtering: perceiving only the negative and not the positive. "I may have nice hair, but notice my hairdresser is trying to cut for my "round" face."
4. Blaming: Blaming yourself or others for problems instead of working to solve them. "My spouse always keeps cookies in the house, that is why I am fat."
5. Controlling Fallacies: thinking that other people are in control of your actions or that you have no control. "I don't have time to exercise."
I can't tell you how many times I allowed my thinking to prevent me from happiness and success, not just in terms of losing weight either. I used to think of myself as a worthless person, whom others were simply tolerating. In truth, I do have that feeling sometimes still. However, I have learned to address that idea head on and feel the feeling, rather than internalize it.
The one simple way this thinking has stopped me in the past is in terms of exercise. I never thought of myself as really capable of doing something like running. I was convinced that I would never be "like those crazy people" jogging along at six in the morning. In truth, I had convinced myself that I was not capable of doing it. That is an example of polarized thinking. "If I can't run; I can't exercise at all." Now, I am one of those people, and I am sure there are people who think I am completely nuts as they drive along and see me walking/running in the early morning hours.
I hear similar types of thinking all the time. "I can't go the gym with all those skinny people." Skinny people are at the gym, but so are a lot of other types of people. Just because you are not perfect, doesn't mean you can't go to a gym. As I told my amazing mother, "no one is looking at you at the gym--they are paying attention to themselves!" (By the way, thinking that others are judging you is an example of "personalization" thinking.)
I'll never forget when I really starting thinking differently about myself in the world. It was the day after my anniversary, when the scale crept up half a pound. I had to dig deep and ask myself, "Why am I so upset by this? Why do I feel so depressed?" I realized that I really needed to actively talk myself out of my negativity and find my "power of positive thinking." I began to really understand that I have achieved so much and am not doomed to failure. I can plan for and expect success in this world. Weight up or down, what matters is how I treat myself and others. If I do good, I can expect to do well. If I eat right and exercise; I will be okay if I fall of the wagon once and a while (like I did on Saturday....I ate so much I got sick! Lesson learned!)
As my stepmom would say, "thoughts are things."
Okay... here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 161
Goal weight: 140
The goals:
Outer goal: What can I say? I am feeling pretty good right now!
Inner goal: oooommmmmm!
See you next week!
This week at my group we talked about an article by Jan Shepard called "What's Eating You: 5 Food Thoughts and Their Effects." This article really touched me, because I saw many of my own issues reflected there.
In summary, they are:
1. Polarized thinking: thinking that everything is either all or nothing or black and white. "I ate one cookie, why not eat the whole bag?"
2.Emotional reasoning: everything you feel must be true. "A person like me doesn't belong at the gym." or "No one will love me, because I am big and stupid.
3. Filtering: perceiving only the negative and not the positive. "I may have nice hair, but notice my hairdresser is trying to cut for my "round" face."
4. Blaming: Blaming yourself or others for problems instead of working to solve them. "My spouse always keeps cookies in the house, that is why I am fat."
5. Controlling Fallacies: thinking that other people are in control of your actions or that you have no control. "I don't have time to exercise."
I can't tell you how many times I allowed my thinking to prevent me from happiness and success, not just in terms of losing weight either. I used to think of myself as a worthless person, whom others were simply tolerating. In truth, I do have that feeling sometimes still. However, I have learned to address that idea head on and feel the feeling, rather than internalize it.
The one simple way this thinking has stopped me in the past is in terms of exercise. I never thought of myself as really capable of doing something like running. I was convinced that I would never be "like those crazy people" jogging along at six in the morning. In truth, I had convinced myself that I was not capable of doing it. That is an example of polarized thinking. "If I can't run; I can't exercise at all." Now, I am one of those people, and I am sure there are people who think I am completely nuts as they drive along and see me walking/running in the early morning hours.
I hear similar types of thinking all the time. "I can't go the gym with all those skinny people." Skinny people are at the gym, but so are a lot of other types of people. Just because you are not perfect, doesn't mean you can't go to a gym. As I told my amazing mother, "no one is looking at you at the gym--they are paying attention to themselves!" (By the way, thinking that others are judging you is an example of "personalization" thinking.)
I'll never forget when I really starting thinking differently about myself in the world. It was the day after my anniversary, when the scale crept up half a pound. I had to dig deep and ask myself, "Why am I so upset by this? Why do I feel so depressed?" I realized that I really needed to actively talk myself out of my negativity and find my "power of positive thinking." I began to really understand that I have achieved so much and am not doomed to failure. I can plan for and expect success in this world. Weight up or down, what matters is how I treat myself and others. If I do good, I can expect to do well. If I eat right and exercise; I will be okay if I fall of the wagon once and a while (like I did on Saturday....I ate so much I got sick! Lesson learned!)
As my stepmom would say, "thoughts are things."
Okay... here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 161
Goal weight: 140
The goals:
Outer goal: What can I say? I am feeling pretty good right now!
Inner goal: oooommmmmm!
See you next week!
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Two More Weeks to Go!
Wow! I think Kaiser deserves a medal! This is my 26th straight week of weight loss on their Medical Weight Loss Program. (Watch, I'll gain weight next week--LOL!) Granted a few of those weeks, like this one was a 1/2 a pound, but that is still better than a poke in the eye!
I was telling my class tonight how instrumental they were in helping me make all kinds of important changes in my life. It is not an exaggeration to say that I am the happiest I have ever been in my entire life. The weight loss in a wonderful byproduct of me feeling like I control my life, not that others are controlling it for me.
So, I started a new job (part of me changing things in my life), and I routinely put in 10,000 steps by 2:15 pm on my pedometer! WOW! It's amazing what being lighter on your feet can do. Here is how I do it:
I walk to and from the office to check my box at every break.
I walk to and from the front of my classroom to the back at least five times every class period.
I walk to and from my car twice a day.
I walk around the school on my break.
Basically, I take ANY excuse to walk around, including going to copy machine twice or three times, instead of just doing it all in one fell swoop--yes, it may seem like I am wasting time, but I am getting those steps in!
Although I have made great strides (pun intended) in the diet and exercise area, I am getting concerned, as the end of my class is coming, that I will backslide into my former bad habits. Already I am noticing a strange addiction to low calorie pudding--to the point that I did not buy any today at the store so I wouldn't eat two or three a day. I was journalling my food, noticing that Jello is my go to food when I am tired, stressed, and/or worried. Even though it does not take me over my calorie count for the day, it's the habit that counts--not the food. Managing one's stress through food is a bad idea, whether you are using chocolate cake or carrots.
At any rate, here are the numbers:
Starting Weight: 224
Current Weight: 162
Goal Weight: 140
Goal Time!
Outer Goal: I want to have fabulous, Jennifer Aniston-like arms!
Inner Goal: To nuture a peaceful space in my heart, and, of course...WORLD PEACE!
See you next week!
I was telling my class tonight how instrumental they were in helping me make all kinds of important changes in my life. It is not an exaggeration to say that I am the happiest I have ever been in my entire life. The weight loss in a wonderful byproduct of me feeling like I control my life, not that others are controlling it for me.
So, I started a new job (part of me changing things in my life), and I routinely put in 10,000 steps by 2:15 pm on my pedometer! WOW! It's amazing what being lighter on your feet can do. Here is how I do it:
I walk to and from the office to check my box at every break.
I walk to and from the front of my classroom to the back at least five times every class period.
I walk to and from my car twice a day.
I walk around the school on my break.
Basically, I take ANY excuse to walk around, including going to copy machine twice or three times, instead of just doing it all in one fell swoop--yes, it may seem like I am wasting time, but I am getting those steps in!
Although I have made great strides (pun intended) in the diet and exercise area, I am getting concerned, as the end of my class is coming, that I will backslide into my former bad habits. Already I am noticing a strange addiction to low calorie pudding--to the point that I did not buy any today at the store so I wouldn't eat two or three a day. I was journalling my food, noticing that Jello is my go to food when I am tired, stressed, and/or worried. Even though it does not take me over my calorie count for the day, it's the habit that counts--not the food. Managing one's stress through food is a bad idea, whether you are using chocolate cake or carrots.
At any rate, here are the numbers:
Starting Weight: 224
Current Weight: 162
Goal Weight: 140
Goal Time!
Outer Goal: I want to have fabulous, Jennifer Aniston-like arms!
Inner Goal: To nuture a peaceful space in my heart, and, of course...WORLD PEACE!
See you next week!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
In the Zone!
Great week this week! I lost 3.5 pounds! Since my BMR is at 1500 calories, that's quite a feat!
Brainstorming with a friend from my weight loss class for reasons for my big loss this week, we came up with....protein! Since I am training for a 5K I am adding a bit more protein into my diet.
Some other things I did differently this week:
I drink more water in the morning.
I no longer eat after 8 PM unless I am genuinely hungry.
In other news...
I started my new job today. It was strange since no one there ever knew me when I was 234. I've come to identify myself as a "fat girl" for so long; it's weird not to have people surprised to see what I look like. My new staff tee shirt is also TWO sizes smaller than the last one I got last year.
I've decided to start this job right by stocking my mini-fridge with healthy snacks and water. It really does help, since the closest food to my job is all junk food. My job is all consuming sometimes, so it's nice to be able to reach into the fridge for a low cal snack instead of donuts in the staff room when hunger strikes. Keeping to a five meal a day plan helps curb hunger as well. I bring two snacks along with my sandwich, so I never feel hungry. Planning is key!
This week's temptation: PTSA breakfast! (However, they had non-fat yogurt--yay!)
Okay here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 162.5
Goal weight: 140
Outer goal: I want be in a size 10 dress by Christmas.
Inner goal: I think I need to readjust my body image--so my goal is to see myself as I really am.
See you next week!
Brainstorming with a friend from my weight loss class for reasons for my big loss this week, we came up with....protein! Since I am training for a 5K I am adding a bit more protein into my diet.
Some other things I did differently this week:
I drink more water in the morning.
I no longer eat after 8 PM unless I am genuinely hungry.
In other news...
I started my new job today. It was strange since no one there ever knew me when I was 234. I've come to identify myself as a "fat girl" for so long; it's weird not to have people surprised to see what I look like. My new staff tee shirt is also TWO sizes smaller than the last one I got last year.
I've decided to start this job right by stocking my mini-fridge with healthy snacks and water. It really does help, since the closest food to my job is all junk food. My job is all consuming sometimes, so it's nice to be able to reach into the fridge for a low cal snack instead of donuts in the staff room when hunger strikes. Keeping to a five meal a day plan helps curb hunger as well. I bring two snacks along with my sandwich, so I never feel hungry. Planning is key!
This week's temptation: PTSA breakfast! (However, they had non-fat yogurt--yay!)
Okay here are the numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 162.5
Goal weight: 140
Outer goal: I want be in a size 10 dress by Christmas.
Inner goal: I think I need to readjust my body image--so my goal is to see myself as I really am.
See you next week!
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Slow and steady wins the race...
Another pound down!
We've been having a heat wave here in the lovely San Francisco Bay Area, which reminded me to talk about water.
You remember water, right? Water consumption is essential to weight loss, and most people in the United States are dehydrated. Yep, that means you are probably dehydrated. When I was eating Optifast only, I was drinking a gallon of water a day, and my blood tests still showed me to be slightly dehydrated.
So, what are some signs of dehydration?
1. Thirst. If you feel slightly thirsty, your body REALLY needs water!
2. Hunger. If you feel hungry, even though you have eaten in the last three hours, you are probably thirsty. The sensors in your brain for hunger and thirst are right next to each other and overlap.
3. This one is gross, so beware. Yellow pee. That's right! Your pee should be almost clear. If your pee is anything other than pale yellow, you don't drink enough water.
4. Dry skin. Your skin should not be flaky, unless you have a skin condition like eczema.
5. Really loose skin. Your skin should plump up a little, unless you are above the age of 90. Even people in their 70's and 80's should have some basic elasticity in their skin.
The rule of thumb is 8-8 ounces of water a day...if your BMI is in the normal range. Be careful, caffeinated drinks have a diuretic effect--so limit caffeine. For those of us who are in the high normal, overweight, or obese categories, you should drink an extra 8 ounces of water for every 25 pounds you are overweight. So, at 230 pounds, I needed to drink 5 extra glasses of water a day. Now, I need to drink 10 glasses of water a day.
You should also eat your water. Fresh fruits and veggies have water in them, so munch away--especially if you are getting hunger signals. Sometimes water rich food can stop both hunger and thirst signals.
The numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 166
Goal weight: 140
The goals:
Outer goal--I want to wear a size 8.
Inner goal--to stay strong and focused during my hernia surgery!
We've been having a heat wave here in the lovely San Francisco Bay Area, which reminded me to talk about water.
You remember water, right? Water consumption is essential to weight loss, and most people in the United States are dehydrated. Yep, that means you are probably dehydrated. When I was eating Optifast only, I was drinking a gallon of water a day, and my blood tests still showed me to be slightly dehydrated.
So, what are some signs of dehydration?
1. Thirst. If you feel slightly thirsty, your body REALLY needs water!
2. Hunger. If you feel hungry, even though you have eaten in the last three hours, you are probably thirsty. The sensors in your brain for hunger and thirst are right next to each other and overlap.
3. This one is gross, so beware. Yellow pee. That's right! Your pee should be almost clear. If your pee is anything other than pale yellow, you don't drink enough water.
4. Dry skin. Your skin should not be flaky, unless you have a skin condition like eczema.
5. Really loose skin. Your skin should plump up a little, unless you are above the age of 90. Even people in their 70's and 80's should have some basic elasticity in their skin.
The rule of thumb is 8-8 ounces of water a day...if your BMI is in the normal range. Be careful, caffeinated drinks have a diuretic effect--so limit caffeine. For those of us who are in the high normal, overweight, or obese categories, you should drink an extra 8 ounces of water for every 25 pounds you are overweight. So, at 230 pounds, I needed to drink 5 extra glasses of water a day. Now, I need to drink 10 glasses of water a day.
You should also eat your water. Fresh fruits and veggies have water in them, so munch away--especially if you are getting hunger signals. Sometimes water rich food can stop both hunger and thirst signals.
The numbers:
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 166
Goal weight: 140
The goals:
Outer goal--I want to wear a size 8.
Inner goal--to stay strong and focused during my hernia surgery!
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Vacation...blessing or curse?
While on vacation in Seattle with my Mom, I lost 2.5 pounds. That's right, 2.5 pounds!
For many of us, trips or simple "stay-cations" are rife with pitfalls for any serious dieter. You eat out all the time, plus you cannot really stay on your normal sleep, water, and exercise routine. I had the same problems, but I made two goals for myself for my vacation. Exercise every single day. Not just walk around, do something that actually raised my heart rate (which is actually really hard for me now, since my resting heart rate is 41!). My other goal was to stick to 1200 calories a day. Here's how I did it.
Exercise: Before my folks got up in the morning, I woke up and walked two miles. Granted, I wasn't jogging most of the time, but I was taking a path that had inclines and required some effort. The hardest part about this aspect wasn't getting up, since my parents don't wake up very early. The hardest part was packing. I was the girl who went to Europe for a week with a school backpack--yeah--I am the lightest packer I know. This was the first trip I took where I had a difficult time fitting everything into a carry on bag! In part, I wanted to bring more fabulous clothes, since I am looking better. However, I needed to bring at least enough clothes to workout in as well. However, it seemed worth it to take a larger bag and check it, so I could have a good chance at meeting my goals on my trip.
Why (you may ask) didn't I just wash my workout clothes at my Mom's? Good question! Fitness asked successful, long term exercisers some of their tricks, and one of them was to have clean exercise clothes available to you AT ALL TIMES. I didn't want to have the excuse of not having clean clothes. In actuality, a few extra tee shirts and leggings didn't take up much room anyway. It was really worth it! What was funny, is that I didn't actually end up packing enough, so my Mom was nice enough to take me to Kohl's to pick up a few extra shirts. It's all a learning process!
1200 Calories: Staying on track with this goal was the hardest. Not because we were eating out a lot (which we were), but because my parents have ONE, one cup measuring cup! Thank God they had a food scale!!! Making food at their house was challenging. I am so grateful to my mother, who took me to the grocery store after she picked me up from the airport (we didn't even go home first!), so I was able to get a lot of pre-measured things (like yogurt and English muffins).
Actually, my family's support was invaluable, as they did not bat an eyelash when I asked for the 57 millionth time whether or not a restaurant had their nutritional information available. It must have been strange eating food with a person who takes five minutes to order dinner ("All dressing and sauces on the side"..."I am sorry are those vegetables steamed or sauteed?" yadda, yadda, yadda). I actually talked to three people (two of whom were managers) about the exact way they prepared their "spa chicken." Some servers will just tell you want they think you want to hear, not give you the truth about how the food is made. Persistence and big tips are key to make sure your food is prepared the way you want it.
When a restaurant does not offer their nutritional information, here is what I do to ensure success:
1. I do not order anything with "crispy" in the description.
2. I do not order any "entree sized" salad. Salads are loaded with extra calories. I order side or green salads only.
3. I will order food that is identifiable--no stews, curries, or sauces. Why? So, I can estimate how much of what I am eating.
4. I always assume that there is 100 calories of hidden fats in any restaurant meal, unless I have good reason not to.
5. I order things dry cooked and steamed. Yes, it's not as tasty as your companion's food, but you will lose weight.
6. Order a la carte if possible--that way, if you just want to eat one egg and English muffin, you are not tempted by the rest of the food in a regular sized breakfast. This technique is harder at dinner time, but still possible.
7. Order the appetizer size of something.
8. Look up the nutritional information of the restaurant before you order--when the server sees the calorie book in your hand, he or she know you are serious.
9. Don't be chintzy--a lot of people don't realize this, but servers often get paid less than minimum wage and live off tips (yep it's legal). If you order something that is off the menu or complicated, tip 20%. Or, in the case of you Optifast folks, leave a the tip you would have left, had you not brought your own food.
10. If you think the server is uninformed or lying to you, just confirm your needs. "Are you sure that fish is cooked without butter? It's really important to me to make sure. I will have to send it back if there is butter on there." The server doesn't want the hassle of you sending back food, so he or she will make sure to talk to the kitchen.
To wrap up, my vacation was a blessing, since I got to hang with my folks and challenge myself in new ways!
Anyway, here are the numbers!
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 167
Goal weight: 140
Outer Goal: Right now, I am looking pretty good, like a chunky Christie Brinkley with glasses--so I perhaps....Elle McPherson on the cover of Sports Illustrated?
Inner Goal: To make sure I treat myself, because I achieved two major goals this week and...say it with me...WORLD PEACE!
For many of us, trips or simple "stay-cations" are rife with pitfalls for any serious dieter. You eat out all the time, plus you cannot really stay on your normal sleep, water, and exercise routine. I had the same problems, but I made two goals for myself for my vacation. Exercise every single day. Not just walk around, do something that actually raised my heart rate (which is actually really hard for me now, since my resting heart rate is 41!). My other goal was to stick to 1200 calories a day. Here's how I did it.
Exercise: Before my folks got up in the morning, I woke up and walked two miles. Granted, I wasn't jogging most of the time, but I was taking a path that had inclines and required some effort. The hardest part about this aspect wasn't getting up, since my parents don't wake up very early. The hardest part was packing. I was the girl who went to Europe for a week with a school backpack--yeah--I am the lightest packer I know. This was the first trip I took where I had a difficult time fitting everything into a carry on bag! In part, I wanted to bring more fabulous clothes, since I am looking better. However, I needed to bring at least enough clothes to workout in as well. However, it seemed worth it to take a larger bag and check it, so I could have a good chance at meeting my goals on my trip.
Why (you may ask) didn't I just wash my workout clothes at my Mom's? Good question! Fitness asked successful, long term exercisers some of their tricks, and one of them was to have clean exercise clothes available to you AT ALL TIMES. I didn't want to have the excuse of not having clean clothes. In actuality, a few extra tee shirts and leggings didn't take up much room anyway. It was really worth it! What was funny, is that I didn't actually end up packing enough, so my Mom was nice enough to take me to Kohl's to pick up a few extra shirts. It's all a learning process!
1200 Calories: Staying on track with this goal was the hardest. Not because we were eating out a lot (which we were), but because my parents have ONE, one cup measuring cup! Thank God they had a food scale!!! Making food at their house was challenging. I am so grateful to my mother, who took me to the grocery store after she picked me up from the airport (we didn't even go home first!), so I was able to get a lot of pre-measured things (like yogurt and English muffins).
Actually, my family's support was invaluable, as they did not bat an eyelash when I asked for the 57 millionth time whether or not a restaurant had their nutritional information available. It must have been strange eating food with a person who takes five minutes to order dinner ("All dressing and sauces on the side"..."I am sorry are those vegetables steamed or sauteed?" yadda, yadda, yadda). I actually talked to three people (two of whom were managers) about the exact way they prepared their "spa chicken." Some servers will just tell you want they think you want to hear, not give you the truth about how the food is made. Persistence and big tips are key to make sure your food is prepared the way you want it.
When a restaurant does not offer their nutritional information, here is what I do to ensure success:
1. I do not order anything with "crispy" in the description.
2. I do not order any "entree sized" salad. Salads are loaded with extra calories. I order side or green salads only.
3. I will order food that is identifiable--no stews, curries, or sauces. Why? So, I can estimate how much of what I am eating.
4. I always assume that there is 100 calories of hidden fats in any restaurant meal, unless I have good reason not to.
5. I order things dry cooked and steamed. Yes, it's not as tasty as your companion's food, but you will lose weight.
6. Order a la carte if possible--that way, if you just want to eat one egg and English muffin, you are not tempted by the rest of the food in a regular sized breakfast. This technique is harder at dinner time, but still possible.
7. Order the appetizer size of something.
8. Look up the nutritional information of the restaurant before you order--when the server sees the calorie book in your hand, he or she know you are serious.
9. Don't be chintzy--a lot of people don't realize this, but servers often get paid less than minimum wage and live off tips (yep it's legal). If you order something that is off the menu or complicated, tip 20%. Or, in the case of you Optifast folks, leave a the tip you would have left, had you not brought your own food.
10. If you think the server is uninformed or lying to you, just confirm your needs. "Are you sure that fish is cooked without butter? It's really important to me to make sure. I will have to send it back if there is butter on there." The server doesn't want the hassle of you sending back food, so he or she will make sure to talk to the kitchen.
To wrap up, my vacation was a blessing, since I got to hang with my folks and challenge myself in new ways!
Anyway, here are the numbers!
Starting weight: 224
Current weight: 167
Goal weight: 140
Outer Goal: Right now, I am looking pretty good, like a chunky Christie Brinkley with glasses--so I perhaps....Elle McPherson on the cover of Sports Illustrated?
Inner Goal: To make sure I treat myself, because I achieved two major goals this week and...say it with me...WORLD PEACE!
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Another Pound Bites the Dust!
Did she or didn't she? Yes she did!!! I FINALLY broke the elusive 170 barrier! I weighed in early this week, due to my trip to Seattle. I was worried, but the result I wanted happened!
It's official...I am in the 160's! So I was thinking of what was going on the last time I was under 170 pounds. Here is my list:
1. The Berlin Wall came down.
2. I paid to see Cinderella in concert.
3. Cell phones were the size of large bricks.
4. I honestly thought that I would die alone surrounded by cats due to my strange addiction to Mojo Nixon.
5. A schoolmate of mine, Randall, did a report on something called "compact discs," and I thought he was crazy that ANYTHING could replace my trusty cassettes.
6. I had to go into the bank to make a deposit to my account.
Please post the lists of what was going on in your life the last time you were at or near or goal weight; I would love to read them!
On a separate note, this was my first week eating zero Optifast. Obviously, it went well as I lost two pounds of fat. I think the hardest part is weighing and measuring everything that goes into my mouth. However, I did relax a bit for my anniversary and I ate almost 1600 calories that day. It was the first time EVER I went over calories, plus I had a glass of wine (which wasn't very good, actually). Other than the wine, my calories were from excellent, nutritious food--so no guilt allowed. For those of you who live in the San Francisco Bay Area, check out the cafe at the De Young Museum (it's part of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco). They have a lot of delicious and healthy food there that is locally sourced. Their coffee is divine!
A tip for those of you out and about on restricted diets: I started asking about vegan options (not vegetarian, which are often loaded with fats) for snacks and treats. Vegan food does not have any animal fats, which often makes it lower in calories. Like many vegetarian foods, some packaged vegan stuff has a lot of sugar, but no egg or butter. For example, a typical vegan cupcake has 150-200 calories, whereas a regular cupcake has 450-600 calories. Vegan food is surprisingly yummy (and I love me some meat, so I was expecting tasteless cardboard). In fact, I go vegetarian 3-4 days a week right now, as it helps me stay on my 1200 calories a day yet still eat abundantly.
Another tip for those of us on transition or maintenance... it turns out Subway does have numerous healthy options for a wide variety of diets (they pushed Subway RELENTLESSLY on the Biggest Loser, so it was sort of a turn off for me). However, while there, my poor hubby fell into the "healthy" menu trap, when he failed to notice that the calorie counts did not include all that makes a sandwich so yummy (like mayo). What's great about Subway is that they will make your food how you tell them. Yes, I paid a 4 bucks for what amounted to two cups of lettuce, a tomato, and one ounce of roast beef BUT I stayed on my plan;and that made the four bucks worth it.
Here are the numbers:
Starting Weight: 224
Current Weight: 169.5
Goal Weight: 140
Here are my goals:
Outer Goal: I want to run the 5K I signed up for the entire time....NO WALKING (and look like a young Elle McPherson while doing it...sigh... I can dream!)
Inner Goal: I need to feel my success and not dwell on my failures....and of course...world peace!
Peace out to you all and post some comments!
It's official...I am in the 160's! So I was thinking of what was going on the last time I was under 170 pounds. Here is my list:
1. The Berlin Wall came down.
2. I paid to see Cinderella in concert.
3. Cell phones were the size of large bricks.
4. I honestly thought that I would die alone surrounded by cats due to my strange addiction to Mojo Nixon.
5. A schoolmate of mine, Randall, did a report on something called "compact discs," and I thought he was crazy that ANYTHING could replace my trusty cassettes.
6. I had to go into the bank to make a deposit to my account.
Please post the lists of what was going on in your life the last time you were at or near or goal weight; I would love to read them!
On a separate note, this was my first week eating zero Optifast. Obviously, it went well as I lost two pounds of fat. I think the hardest part is weighing and measuring everything that goes into my mouth. However, I did relax a bit for my anniversary and I ate almost 1600 calories that day. It was the first time EVER I went over calories, plus I had a glass of wine (which wasn't very good, actually). Other than the wine, my calories were from excellent, nutritious food--so no guilt allowed. For those of you who live in the San Francisco Bay Area, check out the cafe at the De Young Museum (it's part of the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco). They have a lot of delicious and healthy food there that is locally sourced. Their coffee is divine!
A tip for those of you out and about on restricted diets: I started asking about vegan options (not vegetarian, which are often loaded with fats) for snacks and treats. Vegan food does not have any animal fats, which often makes it lower in calories. Like many vegetarian foods, some packaged vegan stuff has a lot of sugar, but no egg or butter. For example, a typical vegan cupcake has 150-200 calories, whereas a regular cupcake has 450-600 calories. Vegan food is surprisingly yummy (and I love me some meat, so I was expecting tasteless cardboard). In fact, I go vegetarian 3-4 days a week right now, as it helps me stay on my 1200 calories a day yet still eat abundantly.
Another tip for those of us on transition or maintenance... it turns out Subway does have numerous healthy options for a wide variety of diets (they pushed Subway RELENTLESSLY on the Biggest Loser, so it was sort of a turn off for me). However, while there, my poor hubby fell into the "healthy" menu trap, when he failed to notice that the calorie counts did not include all that makes a sandwich so yummy (like mayo). What's great about Subway is that they will make your food how you tell them. Yes, I paid a 4 bucks for what amounted to two cups of lettuce, a tomato, and one ounce of roast beef BUT I stayed on my plan;and that made the four bucks worth it.
Here are the numbers:
Starting Weight: 224
Current Weight: 169.5
Goal Weight: 140
Here are my goals:
Outer Goal: I want to run the 5K I signed up for the entire time....NO WALKING (and look like a young Elle McPherson while doing it...sigh... I can dream!)
Inner Goal: I need to feel my success and not dwell on my failures....and of course...world peace!
Peace out to you all and post some comments!
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